Page 6-20

Page 6-20
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19th Jul 2019, 5:13 PM in Chapter 6
Average Rating: 5 (3 votes) Rate this comic

Author Notes:

Rocktopus 19th Jul 2019, 5:13 PM edit delete
Rocktopus
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email: marblegatedungeon@gmail.com
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Comments:

io 19th Jul 2019, 5:16 PM edit delete reply
thusly the trumpets sounded at the appearance of a divine champion.
Rocktopus 19th Jul 2019, 11:19 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Hallelujah!
Lurker 19th Jul 2019, 6:57 PM edit delete reply
"Are you hurt?" "I saw an angel!" -- best way to be branded as a crazy. :-D
Photomaginarium 19th Jul 2019, 8:08 PM edit delete reply
Photomaginarium
Coleen: "... and look, Ma, I have a gaping head injury too. Oh! and the angel was covered in giant alien eyes."
Rocktopus 19th Jul 2019, 11:20 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Indeed!
Matthew 19th Jul 2019, 8:24 PM edit delete reply
This (by which I mean specifically Colleen's origin story) is very frustrating to read at a page-a-week pace. I'm sure it'll be great once it's finished, but it's not a story very well suited to a page at a time.

Which hasn't been true for a lot of Marblegate, where for much of the story there's been some kind of satisfying mini-narrative every one to three pages, accompanying the greater story.

Not sure if there's anything to be done; the relative peacefulness of Colleen's childhood and her utter inability to do *anything* about about bad things (like the excessive taxation) is kind of the point in comparison to the excitement (things happening every page) and agency (she resolves a challenge every few pages) of her life as an adventurer.
Rocktopus 19th Jul 2019, 11:18 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Thanks very much for the feedback! I'm well aware of the problem of weekly one page updates for this chapter. I knew it would be an issue going in.

Unfortunately the pages in this chapter are very busy, complex, and time consuming. I'm currently working full-time as an illustrator to pay for rent and food, and I would love to put out two pages a week again (this chapter would have been done months ago if I had) but I can't afford to do so at the moment.

Thank you for being patient and bearing with me! The chapter has 29 pages in it, so I hope to have it done by the end of August, at which point her origin story will be finished.
Blackwing 21st Jul 2019, 11:25 PM edit delete reply
I have to agree with Matthew on this one.

Colleen is a sweet young lass, but she can be a bit of a wet blanket at times. Considering her background, I guess that's not surprising. To be fair, this chapter does shed valuable insight on why Colleen is the way she is. Unfortunately, due to the lack of action, foil characters, and general weirdness of the main story combined with heavier themes like God and injustice, Colleen's origin story comes across as rather grim and depressing by comparison.

Frankly, I'll be glad when we get back to dungeon-crawling.
Rocktopus 22nd Jul 2019, 8:16 AM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Well I appreciate you letting me know! I tried my best to keep this chapter short, but I had a lot of things to reveal. Like I said, this chapter will be finished by the end of August, so there won't be much more to it.

I'll take your feedback into consideration for future chapters!
Dan 19th Jul 2019, 8:52 PM edit delete reply
This is a much cooler origin story compared to clerics in D&D.

Back in Advanced D&D the cleric was the guy who made their character last and was told the party has to have a healer so we don't have to spike the door and camp for three days every couple of rooms.
Oldarmourer 19th Jul 2019, 10:24 PM edit delete reply
Oldarmourer
I always enjoyed playing clerics, especially in AD&D.
Of course mine usually wouldn't heal 'infidels' without cash upfront unless they converted first..and a raise ? Oy !! You want a RAISE now ?? :)
And they had a habit of passing the plate every time the party found any treasure and either taking High Holydays off or having mandatory services
It's what you make of a class and character that counts ;)
Dan 23rd Jul 2019, 6:29 PM edit delete reply
AWSOME! Totally the way a cleric should be played. I'm going to incorporate that next time I GM a game.
Oldarmourer 25th Jul 2019, 11:13 PM edit delete reply
Oldarmourer
I had a low level cleric that didn't have 'restore' yet so when a party member asked him to cure the lingering effects of a disease he yelled, so everyone heard...
"LEPROSY ??? I can't cure that, that's Big League!!"
Rocktopus 19th Jul 2019, 11:22 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
I feel as if most people don't write good cleric stories, because most people who play D&D aren't familiar with religious life and don't really understand religious people or religious communities.
padanew 20th Jul 2019, 7:33 AM edit delete reply
padanew
I have a very good cleric story but its very long and would not want to overrun your page or story.
ThorinSchmidt 22nd Jul 2019, 6:29 PM edit delete reply
ThorinSchmidt
I think you are exactly right sir! Clerics and Paladins have always (for 30 years now) been my favorite characters to play in gaming settings. Their backstories have always been crucial to making them. I'm glad you are sharing Colleen's with us.
Sturzkampf 22nd Jul 2019, 8:03 PM edit delete reply
Sturzkampf
Also, they are always just a touch insane, which makes them fun to role-play.
Dan 23rd Jul 2019, 7:28 PM edit delete reply
Indeed! Religion is a primary motivator in real life, but both Hollywood and history books hate creating religious protagonists, so we have almost no good examples of how to write them.

Christopher Columbus was religious and expressed a "calling from God" in personal letters but history books completely avoid mentioning that dimension of his character. Most histories give only economic and political motivations for all his decisions.

In the Dresden File books Jim Butcher wrote a fantastic faith driven character, Micheal Carpenter. He wields a Sword of the Cross (one of three swords made from nails from the crucifixion cross). The dichotomy of his faith making him invulnerable to personal threats, but super susceptible to threats against family or friends makes an exceptionally well rounded character.


Later books introduced the two other wielders of swords of the cross...a Shinto and a confirmed AGNOSTIC?!??! I think Butcher got some push-back from the public or his editor. It was like he had to make it blatantly clear the Dresden Files are a fantasy series, not Christian Faith books (in case you didn't catch that based on the Wizards, Fairies, Daemons, magic-items and intra-dimensional travel).

I can see the rational of avoiding real-life religion in writing. Any time you use it you risk offending at least half your audience. But its the main motivator for so many people in real life it leaves a motivational hole in most fantasy/sci-fi writing.
padanew 20th Jul 2019, 3:45 AM edit delete reply
padanew
Good that they all made it out more or less safely. Now just needed to explode the building for a movie finish. I challenge you to do that for a extra vote bonus. lol if you want to that is.
I like super smash bros. 20th Jul 2019, 1:13 PM edit delete reply
I will donate a dollar if he does this
Rocktopus 20th Jul 2019, 5:21 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
I'll see what I can do ;)
Alex Groggett 20th Jul 2019, 6:34 AM edit delete reply
Wow, I’m all caught up! :O
Rocktopus 20th Jul 2019, 5:22 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Aw yeah!
Arcadian Knight 20th Jul 2019, 1:38 PM edit delete reply
She has been awoken to the divine!!! Wonder how this will go, will she be exiled or revered. Time will tell.

Also, Are the straps on his outfit supposed to have changed shoulders in that last panel >.>
Rocktopus 20th Jul 2019, 5:22 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Only a few more pages left in the chapter, so we'll see soon enough!
Chris 23rd Jul 2019, 5:25 PM edit delete reply
The straps have been changing a lot: Right one undone on page 6-17; both done up on 6-18 and 6-19; right undone, then both done up, then left undone on 6-20.

But with all the attention going to the miracle of the angel and the beam, the miracle of the ever-changing dungarees isn't going to get a look in.
Rocktopus 23rd Jul 2019, 7:17 PM edit delete reply
Rocktopus
Thanks for pointing out the continuity errors. I've gone back and fixed up some of these issues!
BornOnTheNinth 21st Jul 2019, 12:32 AM edit delete reply
Oh good, nobody died yet.
Sturzkampf 21st Jul 2019, 11:13 AM edit delete reply
Sturzkampf
I guess it's too late to get to market for those seed potatoes now?
Packless1 21st Jul 2019, 1:50 PM edit delete reply
...seems to be Colleen's lucky day...! ;-)
...perhaps they arrive just right for the 'Happy-Hour' and get them cheaper...?! ;-)

...but srsly...

...take her home and take care of her injuries...!
...i'm not a doctor, but she might have suffered a concussion - even a shock...! (no surprise...!)
...bloody head-wound, seeing angels...symptoms not to be taken easy...!
Blackwing 21st Jul 2019, 11:31 PM edit delete reply
"Mother, I saw an angel" is generally not something you want to hear from someone who is semi-conscious and seriously injured.
MajorDZaster 25th Jul 2019, 6:38 AM edit delete reply
Still better than still seeing it, or seeing a bright light at the end of the tunnel.
Marcel 26th Jul 2019, 2:02 AM edit delete reply
Marcel
I just caught up too!
About the pacing and updates for this chapter, I want to say that in reading it straight through until now the pacing seems fine for a back-story. Those who want a more turn-based pacing might want to wait until the chapter is finished then read it straight through.
Be that as it may, your comic is awesome!
Packless1 26th Jul 2019, 4:52 PM edit delete reply
i.m.h.o. this plot can go in different directions...!
Good: "She saw an angel! She's a saint! Praise her...!"
or
Bad: "She saw an angel! She's a witch! Burn her...!